ICONOCLASTIC LOVE

Is There A Difference

What's the difference in knowing the Love of Jesus and knowing the Love of the Father, God? 

How can the absense of one or the other effect your life and identity as a "Christian", "man", "woman"?

Father Loves Me

I feel like I'm just wading around in a tide pool of God's love and the ocean's depths are calling me for a life of rich eternal and peaceful exploration.
 

 
 

 

A Place of Hope

I'm in Edmond, Washington for the next 3 weeks doing some good and hard personal work that I feel the Lord wants to use to help me to fully overcome many of the "issues" I've had over the years.

I left Sulphur Springs last Saturday morning and drove 950 miles to Denver, Colorado.

I woke up Sunday morning and drove 1300 miles through Wyoming, Utah, Idaho, Oregon, and arrived in Yakima, Washington at 1:00 a.m.

Monday morning I drove about 130 miles through the most beautiful part of the trip.  I'll share pictures later.

Just wanted to update for those of you who've kept coming back and have wondered where I went.

Blogging will be more sporatic over the next few weeks.  But I'll keep posting when I have something to say.

Peace and thanks for stopping by.

How to Start a Life of Prayer

Lord, teach me to pray.

Debt Free!!!

As of last night, our family is officially completely debt free!

FREEEEDOM!!!!!

Now the challenge will be remaining in this state, getting to a point where we're able to invest well, budget well, and give well.

We're at a great place to start over financially and in many other ways.

It feels good!

Lessons Learned in Crisis

Take 30 minutes and soak in this powerful message from Pastor Brady Boyd of New Life Church in Colorado Springs. 

Brady came "home" to Gateway Church this weekend and shared a powerful testimony called "Lessons Learned in Crisis".  He shares the intimate details of and wisdom learned from the shooting on December 9th at New Life Church.

Two Questions: 

1.  What do you really believe, what are your non-negotiable core values in life? 

2.  Is it easy for people to find God when they're around you?

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This week in a session with Pastor Tommy Briggs - he asked me the question about my core values and non-negotiables.

There are times when I can answer those pretty easily and there are times when it's a struggle.

God will place you in situations in life where he will expose your core values and call you into greater allignment with His core values.

The tests and seasons we go through are refining of our faith and are geared to test our faith - strengthen our faith - and make our hope more sure.

What are you going through that appears to be a test of your non-negotiables in life?

First Night Out

We officially spent our first night out of our house last night.  We're staying with Bruce and Tammy Hammargren in Sulphur Springs for the next several weeks until Shelby is out of school and All Stars is over.

Bruce and Tammy are both working out of town so they have an apartment in Plano that they live in most of the time.  So it worked out that we could stay in their house in Sulphur Springs for a few weeks. 

We can't express how awesome that is for us!

The Hammargrens are a young couple and already have grandkids, so one of their rooms is decked out with toys and bunk beds.  They have lots of kids outside toys and a great playground on 2 acres.  They also have a baby bed in their master bedroom that Kennedy is enjoying.  And their guest bedroom has a TV with Dish Network and a King Size bed.

Sweet!!!!!!! 

The kids don't fully understand what all is going on and that this isn't our new home - but they're happy and will figure it all out sometime.

Everything is out of the old house and in storage.

We're looking forward to a great summer of visiting friends, traveling, and working hard to get ready for all of the August/September Fundraisers.

Crazy Times!

Pagan Christianity

Pagan Christianity, by George Barna and Frank Viola answers the questions as to why I've felt guilty for being in ministry for 13 years and why I've felt guilty for getting paid to do what I've done.

Of course, that's not the purpose of the book - the information is pretty powerful to provoke change and awareness... and one can leave feeling a bit guilty for going along with the flow.

However, it should bring about much more than guilt.  It should bring about an awesome awareness of the sucker like way people go along with the flow of cultural history in the name of living "by the Book".

I often told my friends after services "There just has to be more to it than this.  I can't stand seeing all of these people pour into here in search of connecting with God and leaving with just a little buzz of energy, some information about a topic, and less money in their pocket." 

I don't want to preach anymore if this is all there is to ministry.

There has to be MORE TO IT!!!"

I thumbed through it but pretty much wrote it off because I was a "paid Pastor" in an "organized religious institution" and my life's salary "depended" on my leadership role in that institution.  I honestly didn't know what to do about it.

Recently - from a more free and less confining position - I read through the book again.

All I can say is wow!  I still don't really know what to do about it all - but WOW!

I don't think we know what we're doing in the name of God and Christianity/Church.  I know I haven't/don't.

If you're interested you can get started with this free Bonus chapter (PDF).  Of course you will have to figure out for yourself how to handle this information. Also, you can hear Frank on the Nic and Josh Podcast.

Also, Alan Hirsch gives a positive review and Steve Eastman interviews Frank about some of the book's content, including the pagan origin of the sermon, known by the Greek sophists as the"homily".

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I've known most of the facts before from James Rutz's book Open Church- but have never known what to do about it.

I always felt guilty for receiving a ministry salary and couldn't explain why until now.  In ministry - my salary and benefits were way above the average household income of our community but still less than many other Sr. Pastors.  Pastors in churches of 500 or more make a really great living.

I always felt guilty living off of the tithes of people who didn't even make half of what I made.  WAAAAAAY less than 10% of the budgets of the churches that I have been a part of went to help relieve the oppressed, feed the hungry, take care of the poor, and make life possible for the sick and dying.

I typically felt that Sunday mornings and most programs were a waste of time.

• So much time, money, and energy went into one event where so very few lives were really transformed
• So much emphasis was put on one man's performance
• So much emphasis was put on one hour a week
• So much money was poured into the facility and salaries that facilitate that one hour a week
• So many people didn't know any better but to go along with the cultural "worship flow"

I say all of this to say:  There's More!

There's so much more that can happen in the name and power of Christ - but it's not going to happen until the Western Church breaks free from its mode of operations.

End of the World As We Know It

It seems like everytime there are natural disasters in the world and large numbers of people die, then people start talking about the end of the world.

Wasn't Jesus' point more about living a life that is always ready?

I'm just not in to all of the end times prediction stuff, but I heard alot about it today on ESPN radio and on 1080 AM in Dallas - both secular radio stations.

I was a bit annoyed by all of the conversation - so I turned the radio off and ... um...  uh .... started praying that the Lord would come soon.

Go figure!

Live Ready!

Swimming Season, Moving Week, Mother's Day

Sarah washed the van a few days ago - and the kids decided that it was a perfect opportunity to get wet and swim in the street.  Shelby, Hayden, and our neighbor's youngest daughter Katie decided to take advantage of ... water.

Isn't that a hoot?

Did you ever swim in the street?

I swam in nearly everything else - but never the street.

It's like pulling teeth to get them in the bath tub these days.  They don't like getting in the bathtub unless it's in the name of swimming. 

But as soon as washing, soap, shampoo, or any form of cleaning-non-playing item enter's the water area - it's no longer fun.

Hey - but give them some some water in the street and they're happy for ours.

Kids are awesome!

I was invited to join them - but just had to pass.

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HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY SARAH!

This is the kids picnic table that stays on our front porch. 

It's also one of the few local gathering places for the neighborhood kids.

It's like the street thing.

It's hard to get the kids to come inside and eat - but if you put food on the pic-nic table outside - it becomes like ... street swimming in a way.

It's no longer eating lunch - it's an outdoors social gathering.

Seriously - Kids come over to watch out kids eat when there's food on the picnic table.

1000's of snow cones and popcicles have been consumed on the front porch.

We like front porch living!

It's interesting how kids transition though.  They don't fully understand the concept of moving.

All they care about is where they're going to get to play next and how close will it be to:

• The Ocean
• Fish
• Six Flags
• Wolf Creek Lodge
• ChuckECheese

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We're actually spending most of Mother's Day packing since our house closes this Thursday.  We still have a lot of work to do.  We hope to get 95% of finished today.

We're having dinner with several friends tonight and the kids are going to actually get to swim in a non-street pool - assuming the weather breaks 60 degrees today.

It's a gorgeous day and It's going to be a great week!

The Greatest Gift I've Ever Received From Christ: Christospection!

I remember my introduction to "Spiritual Gifts" in my early college years.

I studied through Jack Deer's material, "Surprised By the Power of the Spirit" and "Surprised by the Voice of God".

I read through all of Peter Wagoner's Spiritual Gift Inventory material.

I've taken about 20+ Spiritual Gifts and Ministry Profile Tests over the years from multiple organizations.

I've been through The Flippen Profile Test to determine my personal strengths and weaknesses (gifts and abilities) and several other personality profile tests such as DISC, Myers-Briggs, and even the Biblical Personality Test

And while I wouldn't say that I have the strongest sense of personal awareness - I can openly admit that I'm fairly aware of how I'm wired ... as fully as I can know.

While I want to continue staying aware of who I am and what goes on inside of me - I'm finding that there's even greater value in looking beyond me.

Go figure...

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He and He alone really knows me.  Psalm 139

His ways are so much higher than my ways - so only he knows why he made me the way he did.

He chose the measure of faith to give me.  He chose the gifts and abilities to give me.  He chose the personality to wire me with.  He chose the measure of Grace to offer me.

I'm wired by the Lord.  I'm gifted by the Lord.  I'm "souled" by the Lord.  I'm "spirited" by the Lord. 

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But if I were to name the one Gift that transcends all other gifts - the one privilege that goes beyond all other privileges - the one blessing that goes beyond all other blessings,

it wouldn't be anything that shows up on a profile sheet

it wouldn't be anything that shows up on a Spiritual Gifts Inventory sheet

it couldn't be deducted from any Assessment Forum

it wouldn't be anything I would have to pay in order to discover

Here it is:

The golden nugget - my absolute pearl in life - the cream of the crop most prized possession that I've ever received from the Lord is to get to know the Father.

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If you've known me for some time - and if you've heard me pray before - I use to struggle calling God "Father".  I just never had that type of intimate "Father/Son" relationship with God.

Jesus/Brother/Savior/Lord/Redeemer/Way Maker - Yes!

God - He has just been too big - too distant - too confusing - too indescribeable - too inconceivable - so big that he has been almost just ignorable because I simply haven't known how to relate to Him very well.

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But isn't it refreshing to read Matthew 11:27:

"No one knows the Son except the Father, just as no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him."

So - I just simply asked the Lord this,

"Lord Jesus, as fully as I know and can comprehend - I'm yours. Will you show me the Father?"

That's it.

That has been - pretty much - the only thing I'm interested in knowing.

I'm tired of learning about myself - I'm tired of taking tests that reveal myself to me - I'm tired of going through processes that leave me with nothing but greater introspection.

I want to Know Christ!

Because:

• Jesus said, "if you've seen me, you've seen the Father." (John 14:9)
• If Jesus is Like God - and is God - then God is Christ-like (Philippians 2)

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Today - let's begin the process of setting "introspection" aside - and lets begin the process of taking up "Christospection".

To most truely find yourself - you have to see yourself ... in Christ and in the Father.

What a journey!

That's a lot to grasp and it requires more than "reading your Bible" and "praying".

I'll talk more about it from what I understand later.

Did Eight Belles Really Have to Be Killed On the Track? Seriously!

This afternoon when I got home from work - I was holding and tickling the kids for about half an hour.  Then, when we were winding down, I was holding Kennedy in front of me.  Her left cheek was pressed against my left chest and things were going well.

I had on a blue Polo Button-up long sleve shirt.

She was evidently fascinated with the horse and decided to bite him.

Needless to say, she got me and I screamed like a little baby!

OUCH!!!!!

I was really feeling sorry for the horse!

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This reminded me of a very interesting horse story I heard today.

Eight Belles!  You've probably never heard of her - until today.

She was the runner up in the Kentucky Derby this weekend. 

In front of 157,770, she crossed the wire 4 3/4 lengths behind favorite Big Brown. Then, with the second-largest crowd in Derby history still going nuts, this gorgeous filly collapsed with two broken front ankles.

Dr. Larry Bramlage, the on-call equine doctor at Churchill Downs, said,

"She didn't have a front leg to stand on to be splinted and hauled off in the ambulance, so she was immediately euthanized," he said. "In my years in racing, I have never seen this happen at the end of the race or during the race."

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Seriously?

I'm not a big animal activist or anything, but I'm feeling for Eight Belles.

I just want to know a couple of things:

1. With all of the animal activists in our merciful country - isn't there anyone in America who is willing to take in a horse with two broken ankles?  Are we not medically advanced enough to do this today?
2. Was there no way to put the horse on the Ambulance and euthanize her away from the crowd and cameras?  If you can load her up after she's dead - why couldn't you load her up before she was killed?

I don't get it.

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The Polo got bitten without any warning - and Eight Belles was euthanized in front of nearly 160,000 people.

I'm just feeling for the horses today, that's all.

Obama... Change... Patriotism...What's The Remedy

Take a moment to read through this MSN article:  Obama Faces Down His Patriotism Hurdle.

As I was reading through it all last night - and after watching him respond to the behavior of Reverend Wright, I saw something that I've never seen in a United States President.

I saw and someone actually stand and state that they would like to re-define PATRIOTISM!

Wow - that got my attention.  I'm not even sure the Church is trying to do that. 

The Patriots are one of America's Favorite Champions!

Red, White, and Blue Define our flavor of pride!

We stick our boot in people's ass' who mess with us.

In a world wide survey asking the question, "Are you proud to be [insert nationality]?" It ranges from 1 (not proud) to 4 (very proud), here were the results:

Country	Score
USA	3.73
India	3.67
South Africa	3.55
Canada	3.53
Slovenia	3.46
Spain	3.28
Denmark	3.27
Italy	3.25
Sweden	3.22
France	3.18
Finland	3.17
Belgium	3.07
Netherlands	2.93
Germany	2.75
Average	3.26

No one in the known world is more identified with pride in regards to their "Patriotism" than the United States of America.

Does this need "Change"?

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If Obama has done anything well in his campaign - he has established an identity with the word "CHANGE".  No one could argue that "Change" isn't a great mission statement for a presidential campaign in the United states in 2008.

Take a look around with me and tell me what you would like to see changed in America based on the following topics:

• Religion & Christianity
• Poverty
• Racism
• Social Justice
• Abortion, Homelessness
• Debt, Materialism
• Pollution & Waste
• Our Economy
• War and National Relations
• Health Care and Disease
• Education and Leadership
• Criminal Justice
• Freedom of Speech, Art, Porn, ...
• Marriage & Family
• Sports & Entertainment
• Media and Marketing

.... But Patriotism?

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What presidential candidate - who really wanted to win would even begin to change the United States of America's ... Patriotism?

Patriotism - in my opinion - is the most important social issue in America and is most what needs to be re-defined and changed in the church - if we're ever going to see Kingdom Level Change in America.

That's a bold move!

Proverbs 16:18 is pretty popular and well known:  "Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall." 

Just look at history and every great nation that ever existed.

So if we're the most proud nation on earth - then what's coming around the corner for us?  You don't even have to be a prophet of God to fortell that one!

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Regardless if you like Obama or not - everyone knows what his campaign is about:  CHANGE!

When I read the MSN article last night - I went to sleep thinking,

"He may be going down, but he's serious about "change".  His identity isn't in the colors "red white and blue" - he wants to take patriotism to a whole notha level."

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I'm not voting for Obama.  I'm not voting for Clinton.  And, unfortunately, I'm not crazy about John McCain either.

It's the first time in my adult life that I don't want to vote because I don't like having to pick amongst the best of the worse.

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Some of you may find yourself in the same situation.  If so - I recommend that you take about a week and pour over "Jesus For President" by Shane Claiborne.

I've read most of the Stanley Haurwas books and John Howard Yoder material - and while I'm not in the same category of politics as these guys - I did find Claiborne's material much more practical in regards to how to live in the Kingdom of Heaven - while being a citizen of the United States.

I gained some better insights on how to approach voting this year in the last couple of chapters.

I developed a greater since of clarity in regards to what I can do to bring about "CHANGE".

It doesn't make since to me to make fun of presidential candidates.  It doesn't help anything for me to sit on the sidelines of my life and hope someone else makes a difference.

I have a responsibility to do what I can do where I live as I am able.

I agree with Obama - Patriotism needs to be changed - But I know that if the Church isn't going to do it - It isn't going to happen.

Jesus himself will most likely not change America until the church changes.

If Jesus isn't the Remedy - then i don't know who is.  If the Church won't let him save the world through her love, then i don't know what will change the world.

Let the Moving Begin

We've been packing boxes for the past several weeks - getting ready to put everything in storage.

Today we actually began moving everything into the storage facilities.

So, our bedrooms are all empty except for stuff to go into boxes - and we're all sleeping on the floor for the next 10 days.  (except for Queen Kennedy. She still has her bed).

Ok... it's not that bad - we actually have our matress on the floor in our room.  It's cute I guess.

The kids love it.  It's not a mattress to them. 

It's a TRAMPOLINE!

Hayden calls it a "Jumpaline".

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The rest of our moving should be pretty easy... just alot of boxes and ... STUFF.

We both are a bit wowed with how much STUFF we have. 

When we moved here 4 years ago - we were completely debt free and didn't have very much "STUFF' to fill the house with.

We'll leave here debt free also ...  but with a whole lot more STUFF! 

It looks like the older you get and more kids you have - things just sorta ... show up in your house and before you know it - you've got a lot of STUFF.

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It was a good day!

We're going to Gateway Church tomorrow

Billy Ray: Come on Dude!

Just when you think things are going pretty well with a Disney Channel Pop Star - Daddy Ray Cyrus has to start doing glamor shots with Hannah Montana.

Seriously - what in the world is sexy about this picture?  It's just not good...right?  What's the message?

Who really thought it would be a great idea to do this?

I don't want to be mean or ugly - but Billy Ray, come on dude!  Get out of the spot light and never do another glamor shot with Hannah Montana.

Miley Cyrus, (Hannah Montana) - caught a lot of flack this week for taking some "way beyond her time" photos with Vanity Fair magazine.

Annie Leibovitz??? - come on Billy - surely you knew what you were getting into when you let this lady snap shots of your daughter.  She's known for this kind of stuff.

Poor Judgment for Billy.  Your daughter isn't a 30 year old movie star - she's a 15 year old Disney star with 6 year olds following her. 

Billy, stand up man.  The world doesn't need any "Artistic Expressions" of your 15 year old daughter with no clothes on - covered only by a sheet. 

Vanity Fair - not cool!

Miley ended up apologizing to her fans in this video and said she was embarrassed for the photo that ended up on the cover - but when it all comes down to the wire - BILLY - YOU'RE IN CHARGE!

Just a few suggestions/questions for Billy Ray here: 

• Miley's fans don't read Vanity Fair - so what are you doing in their market with your daughter.  I know you didn't need the money?
• Stay out of photo shoots with your daughter - especially sexy ones that end up in the media.
• You've already had your time - fade away into another market.  Keep singing, just fade away from your daughter's success
• Don't EVER let anyone take pictures of your 15 year old daughter without clothes on
• Write the public an apology for being a selfish and exploitative Father

Just a few suggestions for Miley:

• Come on Be Different From All of This - for your own sake!  You have a greater responsibility in life than the average teenage girl posting risque pictures of themselves on the web.  They all think it's sexy - it's not.  It hurts you!
• Take a break from the spotlight for a while - get some clarity about what's happening - forget "momentum" before you ruin yourself like many others have

Heath Benedicts' Tough Journey to Success Ends in Tragic Death

Take a moment to read Bill Williamson's story about the death of NFL draft prospect Heath Benedict.  He was found dead in January of this year due to heart failure.  He had an enlarged heart that went undetected for years.

Heath originally signed a letter of intent as a Bluechip Prospect with the University of Tennesee in 2002. But his career in Knoxville was cut short because of his interest in partying.

He spent the next 3 years out of football.

But since he redshirted his freshman year at Tennesee, he still had 4 years of elegibility left.

Fortunately, things turned around for the good in Benedict's life.  He ended up at tiny Newberry (S.C.) College, where he became the school's best football player and an exemplary student.

He was the only Division II player invited to the Senior Bowl, where by all accounts, he made a strong showing. Benedict was projected as a third or fourth-round lineman, but you get the feeling that he would've made a team no matter where he was drafted.

Heath loved the game and was all about his family and friends.  He was a party waiting to happen  and was on his way to redeem himself by re-entering big time football again. 

Bill Williamson told of this one scene that took place following the Senior Bowl:

"Benedict simply wouldn't leave the field. The Newberry College star was having too much fun. About 45 of Benedict's family and friends from throughout the country had converged on the Gulf Coast to celebrate a new beginning for the 6-foot-6, 335-pound Benedict.

As soon as the game ended, many players and coaches headed to a ceremony at the other end of the field to hear the announcement of the postgame awards. Not Benedict. He headed to the stands. After he coaxed a security guard to let his posse join him, an hour-long love fest ensued. Pictures, hugs, autographs, reunions.Last weekend was supposed to be a celebration for a young man who had found redemption away from the glaring lights of the SEC.

Courtesy of Amy Riser

Heath Benedict was a friend and mentor to young Rachel Riser (left) and her brother Jacob.

Some lives are just hard and cut way too short.

Blessings to Heath's family and friends.

One More Mav's Post

I guess the question that ran through my mind off and on all day was:

What if the Lakers treated the Phil Jackson according to the same grid that the Mav's treated Avery Johson?

Does Jackson need to be fired after this season if the Lakers lose early?  Of course not.  Give him some more time and they'll be the best again...maybe.

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It doesn't seem like the answer should be to have a coaching turnover every 4 years.  I don't think long lasting success happens in that type of atmosphere.

Stuck With the BCS Til' 2014

Looks like all the discussion of having a College Football Playoff System is a waste of time.

So far that's great for LSU - but it's bad for the sport.

Avery Johson: Lesson 101 in Blameshifting

So sad for the Dallas Mavericks.  I thought they MIGHT come back and win last night, but they missed a rebound opportunity and it was over.

I feel like I'm supposed to be rooting for my home state - but I'm not used to New Orleans having a team.  I haven't gotten on board with them yet. 

So long Avery!  Not sure who the next coach will be, but speculations have already started.

I stopped feeling sorry for Avery Johnson when he verbally blamed his players for losing the games.

HOWEVER - if anyone on earth has the right to do a little blame shifting - Avery Johnson does.

It's not his fault Cuban hired rusty old Jason Kidd midseason at point guard and ended up with the worse possible match up against Chris Paul.  Chris Paul is just awesome.  They never made the transition with Kidd.  Now, that could be Avery's fault... I don't know.

It's also not his fault that his players wouldn't or couldn't play well enough to win.

They shot 37% in the playoffs... pretty bad.  Regardless, a coaches last days become reality when he verbally shifts the blame outside of himself for losing. 

He cancelled practice before the final game and then gave cudos to the players for stepping up in leadership and working themselves out.  On the pre-game show last night, he said that he was proud of his players for "finally stepping up and showing some leadership."

The writing was on the wall.  He knew he was gone.

The sad facts are that the Mavericks look very old compared to New Orleans.

The future for the Mav's is looking bleak - unless they can get alot of awesome YOUNG talent in trades this offseason.

I think Josh Howard is next to go.

"Thank You God For the Police Talking to Our Car Today"

I got pulled over by a police today for letting Hayden ride in my lap in the front seat from Coleman Park to my house... 4/10 of a mile...

Ok - let me explain...

I decided to spend the day with Hayden today.  So we:

• Went to eat lunch with Shelby at school
• Went to Kids Kingdom and played for nearly an hour
• Went to Coleman Park and watched an older gentleman fish
• Played with Worms
• Walked in the cold creek with our shoes off
• Made boats out of sticks and tree bark and floated leaves down the waterfall creek
• Played on Imagination Mountain
• Chased Black Birds
• Headed Home

On the way home I let Hayden ride in my lap.

We had the windows rolled down and we were listening to Rich Mullins sing "Calling Out Your Name" very loudly.

We were free!

We were ALIVE!!!

We were LOVIN IT!!!

Until we turned the corner and a police officer was turning in front of us.

She gave me a warning after I explained to her what we were doing.

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So tonight - when I was tucking Hayden in for bed, I was holding him and thanking the Lord for all we did today.

Then it was His turn:

"Dear God - Thank you for mommy and daddy.  Thank you God for the police talking to our car today..."

I don't remember much after that - I picked him up and threw him in the air onto the bed and tickled him til' he couldn't stand it.

I'll let him finish the prayer tomorrow.